Pray Without Ceasing
Psalm 55: 1-17
My oldest friend Rachelle and I used to have prayer contests. She lived right next door and we had a path between our houses that was well traveled. I could travel it with my eyes closed. It was worn down so much that we could find it in the dark and when big brush grew around it. We spent countless nights at each of our homes and when the lights went out, and our giggling subsided, we would see who could pray the longest. We would each begin with prayers for mom and dad and our brothers and cousins. I usually outlasted her, but only because my dad’s side of the family is Catholic and I have a million cousins. I prayed for all of them by name. Sometimes we would add our friends in the neighborhood or our dreams for the future. Sometimes we would pray that we could live that close forever. And most of the time we would fall asleep before we got to the Amen. It was as if God was right in the middle of our slumber party- so comfortable and casual, prayer was just as easy as having our dolls talk to one another about their outfits or playing dress up. Prayer was easy. That is until I learned that we didn’t pray like that in church. In church we had to say just the right things and use particular words. We said things like, “Thou art”. In church, God seemed more like the school principal than my dearest friend. I would rather avoid him than come to him with my deepest hurts. My prayer life went underground. It had two personalities- one that was all dressed up and then one that was intimate and real. It has really only been in the last few years that I have reclaimed prayer and come to love prayer. I never felt like I was doing it right or that I could grasp what was actually happening when I prayed. From what I have heard, I am not alone. Many of us would find it difficult to hear Paul’s command to “pray without ceasing.”
And why is that? We come to prayer with all kinds of ideas about what it is supposed to be. We come to prayer feeling as if there is a handbook that we missed along the way. For many of us, we come to prayer feeling as if there is some kind of professional way to do it and we just aren’t professionals. Yet, as silly as it sounds, there is no such thing as a professional prayer or a perfect prayer. My colleague Kathy Musser said that our prayers to God are like a child’s drawing because they simply can’t be ugly. They are just perfect as they are. So today I want to deconstruct some of the obstacles to praying that we might need to overcome before we could begin to hear Paul’s command, to pray without ceasing.
Obstacle #1: We don’t know where to begin. Martin Copenhaver, speaks about our relationship with God in prayer as not unlike our other relationships. It is like meeting someone new. We begin with social customs, like formalities and small talk. We tend to hide our shortcomings and stick to subjects we know well. We avoid silence because it is awkward with someone new and we quickly return to comfortable subjects. So we can start with prayer this way. “Hello God, it’s nice to meet you.” At first we might find that long silences are awkward. We might stick with more comfortable subjects like our family and our work. But God doesn’t ask us to offer up anything in particular, just to offer it up. “Good morning God, thanks for another day.” “Hi, God, I would like to get to know you better.” “Good night God.” Begin at the beginning and let it grow from there, one moment at a time.
Obstacle #2: We believe prayer should be dressed up for God. This is what I experienced as a child. I was praying fine until I prayed in church! Children are probably better pray-ers than most of us. They say what’s in their hearts without fear of saying the wrong thing or using the wrong words. They offer it right to God with language that is their own. Jesus actually spoke about this in the Gospel of Matthew. He said, “And whenever you pray, do not be like the hypocrites; for they love to stand and pray in the synagogues and at the street corners, so that they may be seen by others.” Jesus warns us against praying to impress or praying in a way that is not authentic to us. We don’t need to choose our words perfectly or to pray with especially religious terms. Our language of prayer should be exactly that, our unique language. If you are a person of few words, your perfect prayer might be, “Hi God, thank you.” If you are a person who loves the ocean and finds God there, your perfect prayer might be, “God of waves and tides, wash over me.” We don’t need to put our prayers in suits and ties. God just wants to hear from us, right from our hearts.
Obstacle #3: We feel as if prayer should happen in a special place at a special time. For a long time, I would begin every year with the resolution to set aside time each day in silence, surrounded by candles to pray with God. I thought God required a particular environment. And inevitably I would fail and resign myself to thinking that I could never be a super Christian. I decided that maybe when Paul said, “pray without ceasing” he meant it only for special Christians like monks and nuns, people who have the time to be extremely good Christians. But we read in scripture, that Jesus rarely did that. He prayed right where he was in whatever circumstances he found himself. Even when he was on the cross he prayed, there was no fancy language or candles, no silent corner, and it wasn’t long, it was the truth from his heart, “Father forgive them for they don’t know what they are doing.” Prayer should happen wherever you are. In a meeting when your mind wanders, you say in your head, “Hi God.” When you are driving and you feel something stirring within you “Thank you God.” When you sit at the table to eat, “I feel blessed to have this here right now.” You don’t need much to pray, just you and your open heart.
Obstacle #4: We don’t understand how prayer works so we are hesitant to do it. I struggled with this one for a long time. It’s a wonderful question and theologically speaking it is aimed right at the heart of the mystery of God and how God works in the world. I always got hung up on the commonly touted pop culture faith proclamation that everything happens for a reason. I don’t believe that and I would find myself asking, if that is true then what good is prayer? If God has already determined the course of human events, then why would I engage in conversation, what’s the point? But God gives us the gift of free will, we have choices and while I believe that God sees all of the possibilities before us, God cannot force us to behave in particular ways. Prayer is one way God can reveal what God has in mind for us. I have had the experience of being changed in prayer, of having a new direction revealed, new possibilities opened and I believe that is God. It is how God gets to us, how God can influence us. I heard someone say once, “Well if God knows what is in my heart, why do I need to pray?” It’s a good question and I think God wants to hear what we think about what’s in our heart. God might know that we are hurting, but in prayer God can join us right to the depths of our souls, in prayer we are inviting God to go right to the pain, like somehow prayer is an opening for God to swirl through the doors of our spirits. We don’t know fully how it works, but we are invited to do it anyway.
Jesus’ asks us to pray for our enemies and those who hurt us. He prays in silence, he prays with friends, he prays for healing and for guidance. He prayed wherever he was, with whomever. And Paul asks us to pray without ceasing. He didn’t say set aside an hour each day to sit in silence surrounded by candles and pray your most poetic prayers to God. He said to pray without ceasing. Pray in all things and through all things. Pray when you see something beautiful. Pray when you need to say thank you. Pray when you are hurting. Pray just because you are alive. Paul asks us to pray without ceasing, each of us, just as we are. And as we start our Lenten walk together I invite you to be bold in your praying. Join our prayer study, volunteer to pray at your committee meetings, offer real prayers to be held by your brothers and sisters in Christ. Pray without ceasing. Amen.